A cheesy situation By Kate

“Now get out! And STAY OUT!!!”

With one last longing look at the cheese board sitting on the kitchen table, I was hustled out of the door with one swipe of the broom. BANG!  Went the door. I sighed. Why did humans never like us? To take my mind off it, I dreamt about heaven. Cheese heaven.

Obviously it was never going to come true, but even so, I kept on dreaming. I dreamt of my house, cheese walls, cheese floors, cheese ceiling. Hard cheese for nibbling on, and soft cheese for scooping up with both paws. Suddenly I snapped out of my dream because a line of drool dribbled out of my mouth and splashed onto my paw in the most off-putting way.

As you probably have realised, I love cheese. Actually, that’s an understatement. I am the best cheese lover IN THE WORLD!!!!!

Anyway, away from the cheese and on to me. I’m a mouse and, as I said, the biggest cheese lover in the world. My name is Jean. Yes, I’m French and yes, I have a moustache and a beret. I just can’t get enough of that stuff the colour of daffodils……..Oh, sorry, I’m slavering on the page again!

I’m never going to get enough to eat tonight. There’s only one place I know. I hate going there. The muddy sludge leaks into the drain which is old with rust. The gutter pipe leaks creating a puddle the colour of dishwater. It is always dark as it has no windows and so it seems the size of a cupboard. Spider webs lurk in every corner and sometimes so do their owners, waiting to gobble up an innocent fly at every chance they got.

This damp, dark, musty place was under the pavement, in the drain. It wasn’t that wet, only when it had been raining. I knew it hadn’t tonight, so I decided to go along. And I was in luck. Someone had thrown a cardboard box with a fresh cheese burger on the pavement! It must have been blown into the drain by the wind!

Well, I’ve just come back from my dinner and, I have to say, it’s been the best for a long time. I never usually go for fast food, but this time it was a winner. I’ll write again in the morning, but for now I have to sleep on the cold, hard pavement. Yuck!

Okay, so I’ll explain why I’m in a cage at the vet.

I trekked into the woods for more scavenging, when I saw heaven. Was it heaven? Or was it not? A picnic blanket laden with CHEESE. All sorts. I had reached the middle plate of camembert when it hit me. Literally. Some humans found me gazing at their lunch, and threw a hard cheddar block at my head. It made cheesy fireworks, the cheese sprinkling like confetti around me.

I took the chance and grabbed.

So I guess it turned out okay……..